Ho! What a day? or is that Night?

Been to Coimbatore for the Weekend!!! My friends Birthday. Had an amazing time. It was a surprise visit to her place. Like me she is also a nomad. CBE is her work city. She never knew that I would be coming in. The arrangements had been made by one another common friend of ours. I reached CBE around 11.00 pm. Was picked up at the railway station and we drove straight to her hostel. Obviously turning whenever there were turns in the road.
She was the only with whom I had the opportunity to play my pranks...
I was outside her room. Called her at 11.55 pm.

Me: Hai Di!
She: Hi ( Sleepily)
Me: Just called to say Happy Birthday Darling Wife!!( Ho! I forgot to tell you that among us I call her my wife and she calls me her hubby)

She: Thanks Purusha...Any plans coming to CBE?
Me: Nope! ( All this time I was standing outside her room

We were talking then I gently tapped her room door. She was so engrossed in talking to me she didn't hear the knock. I had to tell her that I could hear a knock... She sheepishly got out from her cot.

The corridor was awake with a Zero Watts bulb. Even before she could open the door I left the place. Myself and our other friend burned some incense sticks and snake tablet. As she walked out we made noise from the anklets...

She : Who' that?
Silence
She: Is anyone there?
Silence
She went to the switch board to switch the Tube light... I made a growl...Uuuuuuuuu....and giggled...
She : Oh No.. Shit..( Went back and closed the door) All the time I was in the phone line
Me: Hey who was that?
She: Dai Purusha am afraid di. I heard a girl walking with an anklet.
Me: Let her wear. Whats your problem?
She: No di. There was no one around

I banged her room door.

She: Ammmmmmmmaaaaaaaaa
Me: Hey! Cool. Ask who is this?
She: No. I wont am afraid. This thadi maadu ( Big Bull - her colleague) she is sleeping like a pig here...Not waking up..
She: Josh, get up di. Chk who that is. am afraid.
She II: Please di. am sleepy. You chk for yourself. (She knows the plan)

She: Who is that? Am sleeping.
ME: Closed the phone piece. Hai Di Pondatti ( Wife) Its me!!!
She: Bee, some one is standing outside my room door and speaking just like you.
I was banging harder with my leg. Open the door. I say open the door.
Me: Dont be a stupid. Go open the door.
She: No I wont.
ME: Whats happening there. Now dont be afraid dear. Relax. and go open the door.
She: Ho No.
Me: OK. Now open the door. I will stay online and will talk till dawn if you want. Dont worry am there...

There she opened the door. The coloured cake was ready and bang she opened the door. She was in all colours. The rest was all fun from there. And this was one pic which I took after cake cutting....

NOW THAT YOU ALL KNOW .. pART iI WOULD BE CONTIUED TOMORROW

I was maddened

We girls were having a good time last Sunday at Hostel. Though we had everything, something was missing. That was the time we were hungry as well. It was sometime after 9 pm. WE had just completed our dinner. All we wanted is to munch something. Chackoo asked me to call the Spencer’s Daily, which was near to my hostel. I called up to inquire about store hours. We also had our own doubts whether the store is open on a Sunday. The most amazing and unexpected conversation transpired over the phone. So amazing that I wished I had somehow recorded the conversation.

Store Employee: Hello, thank you for calling [Blah Blah Blah], how may I help you?
ME: Are you working today?

Store Employee: Pisst…!!! why are you my reporting manager?

Me: Huh… like I wanted to know if the shop is open on a Sunday.

S.E. : Now that I have taken the call, hope you know the answer.

I was getting so dumb. I controlled my rage and continued my speaking. By this time around the girls around me started to search for my missing nose!!!

Me: How long is the store open?

S.E.: Look, as long as we are made to s(h)it here, the entire long store is open. But tell me, Why do you want to know? Why would you want to know about our working hours?

Me: I’d like to come to your store…Can I come now? S.E.: That’s a stupid question. Anyone can walk in as long you don’t shop lift!!! Me: I did call a store, yes?

S.E. : Yes, this is [Blah Blah Blah].

Me: Okay great, I’d like to come in and look at what you have for sale and possibly maybe even buy some stuff.

S.E.: Coool (Blame it on Shankar or Rajni…. But this thing I just couldn’t digest)
Me: Do you sell.. (Click… the line went dead)

Me: I actually wanna buy some goodies…I wanted to check

Me: Okay, thanks anyhow.

What do you have to give me now?

One of my friend has given me an exercise . She had a series of Questions with her hoping to get an answer from me!!!! I was pestering her for a good title to write...I never thought she would use this chance to dig me out... Not even the school question papers have made me wonder and think… Here is to you dear KS (yes! My room mate!!!)

If I give you

Rs. 1, 00,000/- and ask you to eat the food our Hostel Warden cooks?

Ask me to die. I would do it. Don’t insult me.

Rs. 1, 00,000/-, would you walk naked for a half mile down a public street

Oh! God! I have done that. I never knew people would get paid for this. I have even danced in the road and cried and made a lot of fuss over everything. I was about 2 yrs. old then….

Rs.100, would you kiss another girl?
Arrey… I have done this many a times yaar…Ask my sis….
Aaaaaarrrrrrrgh... Do you mean lipology Kiss? Hmmm… gotta think.. Don’t you feel Rs. 100/- is too low…???

Rs. 1000/-, would you spend a night inside the bathroom?

Yes I would.*

* Conditions apply

Rs. 10000/-, would you shave your head?

How many times you wanna me to shave. Tell me.

Rs. 50000/-, will you have sex with a member of the same sex?

What a bloke you are? NO. I won’t. If you could add another zero in the last, may be I would.

Rs. 5000/- would you watch Nee, Naan, Nila movie once? You need to watch this movie alone.

* Conditions Apply.

Rs. 1000/- will you take Hot drinks?

Kuduthu Paaru….Please check if they have any Jumbo Pack….

You’re speaking about Coffee right?

Rs. 3, 00,000/-, would you stop working?

That’s what am already doing. But am getting paid still.

Rs.50000/-, would you remain silent for full 24hrs.?

Konjam Kashtam. Suppose i manage 12 hrs. would you still pay me 1/2 of the amount. Even 1/3 is ok with me.

Rs. 100000/- would you stop blogging?

Is this KS or Vigneswaralu?

Well whoever it is, I would. Do you mind giving me an additional 50 K?

Condition:

* Give me a book. Give me a room spray, a chair and a Flask full of Coffee.

You dont know what I did yesterday!

Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me... Gotcha… - Anonymous

So do I.

I don’t have any other thing to do. Santosh is asking me not to think. God! But I have a problem. You all know that I live in my work city, in a hostel. I share my room with one another girl. A fussy one. Some how she manages to irritate me. For the past one week I have been thinking and rethinking on what I could do to confuse her…This is what I did yesterday. (Vigneswaralu, try this... it could be useful for you too!)

I left the room at 7.30 pm and was sitting in one another room till 10pm. When I got back to my room, she was in deep sleep. Somewhere around 1 .00 a.m. I nudged her, quite enough to stir her from her sleep. I pretended to talk and started to walk in sleep. The next day morning, she was asking me to see a good doctor. I asked her what my problem was.

She: Why don’t you see a good doc? I saw you walking and going to the terrace.
Me: You are speaking about me is it?
She: Yeah! I thought you were going to loo. I followed you sleepily. But to my shock, you went upstairs and you looked up the sky and started to speak.
Me: What? How could you say this?
She: No dear. I saw you walking out in sleep. You were talking to someone in your sleep.
Me: I giggled. Looked at her funnily. KS (Identity Sealed), are you alright?
She: Yeah. Why do you ask me that?
Me: Because, I was working in night shift yesterday. I came back only at 5.00 am.
She: No, but I saw you yesterday evening.
ME: Yeah, I was here till 7.30 pm. And the work timings were between 8.00 pm to 4.00 am.
She: You don’t work on shifts. You have never said this to me. I have never seen you working in shifts.
Me: I pee. Do I say that to you?
She: Enough. I can’t take this any more!
ME: The Pee?
She: Holy Shit!
ME: I know the Pee is Shit. But I never knew its Holy?
She: Aaaaaaaaaaargh!!!!!
ME: Oh dear. I gotta sleep. Am tired. The night was hectic. I didn’t have a moment to shut my eye. Let me sleep. Can you just order my lunch while you go?

Me: hey…. One more thing! Should I call your mother?
Poor thing. She was looking at me in disbelief. At least for the next one week, she would be quite. Whadya Say?

Bang! The door shut behind her. Puuuuuuuupppp

Am getting diturbed? Is that what you call love?

I contemplated suicide again - this time by inhaling next to an insurance salesman.-Woody Allen

You all know by now that I am living on my own at my Work city. Well, the monsoon has just started. And we had showers yesterday. I love playing in rain and mom allows that too.. . Every one used to tell her not to allow children to play in rain
Till one day i heard her reply I didn't know why she allowed.This is what happened then ( when I was say 12 or 13 yrs old)

Mrs. X: Think you like rain a lot
My Mom: Yes. Every one likes rain.
Mrs. X : But why should you allow your kids to play in rain? Wont they get affected.
My Mom: You are right. Had it been the younger one I would not have let her play. But its Bee, thats why I let her....
(Mrs . X was bit annoyed ... Even I was bit taken how could my mother not own me!?)
Mrs. X : Why is it so?
My mom: Well, I just want her to bathe properly.

Now as I lay back thinking of that horrible discovery my mom made about me ... I felt him. I sensed his strong urge to get into my bed. There he was, trying all his pranks. He then moved to my neck. I sensed him there. Shamelessly I waited for him to move down. I was like getting ... Oh No! how could I say that? He bit me. Near me ears i heard his hiss...I know he is driving me crazy.

As the night falls, without my permission and without being held by anyone he enters my room.. night by night...But yesterday was different. I wanted to put an end to this ... Here I was lying in darkness feeling his arrival...

Finally I went to sleep.When I woke up, he had left. I searched for him but to no avail, only the sheets bore witness to last night's events. My body still shows his marks, making it harder to forget him.

Tonight I will remain awake and wait for you...as soon he appears I will quickly grab and won't let him go, will hold him with all my strength. Not only that my dear Night Lover, I have got all those new repellents in the market...I know for sure that you will be killed ...You F$#King mosquito...