I am not George Bush!

Have you ever written an imposition? Yes! The ones the teachers force us to do for not listening in the class? I remember it’s still as fresh as the coffee my mom gives me at 6 am. I called my mom this morning. She said my College Principal had been there, (with whom she had become very friendly, reason: Invariably, this Poor Bee).

She had been there to invite us for her son’s wedding. She was the one who gave me a set of rules and made me write 50 times. When the whole world gives the syllabus subject as imposition, she was the only different woman. My dad had preserved almost all the imposition I have done in School. He has also got the last one I did in my college. He has them all to show to his unborn grand children!
(IF you still have me around, all these will follow me to my grave.)

This imposition she made me write when I was in the 5th Semester. Not without a reason. I was late to college as usual. This time, I got caught by her. She liked me. But, she always used to have a stern look at me.

Princi: Why are you late Bee?

Me: There is a sign down the road …

Princi: Don’t you have any other reason? What could be there in a sign possibly have to do with you being late?

Me: The sign says, College Ahead. Go Slow.

She looked into my eyes and said

Princi: Follow Me.

Me: That’s what I have been doing. My mom still complains about my behavior.

Princi: I asked you to come with me to my room. Don’t speak unless and until I ask you to.

Whatever I wrote as imposition, I asked my mom to dictate it over the phone and has given it to you as religiously as I could.

A burp is not an answer.
I will not eat in the class.
I will not pat others to sleep while the lecture is going on.
I am not a dentist.
I will not yawn.
I will not aim for the head.
I will not bring my squirrel to class.
I will not bury the new comer under the bench.
I will not call the principal Spud Head.
I will not park my vehicle in staff parking place.
I will not bribe the AV room assistant and watch movies there.
I will not charge admission to the bathroom.
I will not sit in the last row anymore.
I will not make the fresher’s lick the board
I will not draw in the class room board.
I will not write with my key on the principal's car bonnet.
I will not eat things for money.
I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty.
I will not fake seizures.
I will not cry for my grandfather who died even before I was born.
I will not bet anymore.
I will not instigate revolution.
I will not prescribe medication.
I will not sell school property.
I will not make jokes in the library.
I will not sleep through in the class.
I will not snap bras.
I will not spank others.
I will not torment the emotionally frail.
I will not trade my dress with others.
I will not waste chalk.
I will not yell SHE’S DEAD at roll call.
I will not eat the class monitor’s lunch box and fill it with sand.
I will not keep smiling at the new lecturer whenever she sees me – Inside or outside the class.
I will not keep names for the Prof. and lecturers.
I will not celebrate my birthday every six months.
I will not collect money for my birthday celebration.
I will not puke in front of the staff room.
I will not practice singing in the Chapel. I know am in college and am no more a kid.
I will not play Pacha Kuthirai inside the college and in the class especially.
It's potato, not potatoe.
My name is not Dr. Death.
No one is interested in my undies.
The cafeteria is not my play ground
I will dress like a girl.
I will not display the personal letters on the college notice board.
(Incidentally, this was the love letter written to me by the Principals son. I painted on his name with a whitener and put it on display.) Hee hee Hee... he is getting married. Papaaaaaaaa why don’t you decide at least now?)
I know, they are laughing at me, not with me.
This punishment is not boring and pointless.

Warning/Disclaimer/Note ( Keep it as you like it!) : The title and the post has no links whatsoever. All I tried to do was give a title to this post.